The triangle of sadness is the triangle, masked by illusion of choice and justification.
I have to pick. I can’t have all three of anything. I need to sacrifice something, it’s bad enough that my friends have been telling me to get off the internet more times than I can count. But it’s different when it actually clicks. School is online so it seems like that’s what I have to pick for online: School and it costs time and money. I feel like I’m doing girl math…
Pick two triangles visualized
But I want to frolic on the internet 🌐 with my friends but seems like that’s not an option at least not at the moment. I’m extremely whelmed which what’s happening right now that I can’t even wrap my head around it. Not numb in a sense but ignorant to it. It’s not that I’m not in a good place or anything but I have a tendency to get sick when thinking too much about what is going on which in turn means I’m not letting it out via writing or hobbies plus bottling it up which leads to panic attacks (fun).
It’s a deep tightness that comes over me when I let the world around me make decisions for me that I don’t agree with and a lot of that has been happening for a minute now. Like I’ve made the decisions that directly pertains to myself but there all these other compounding choices that didn’t mater to me in the past and now just fold over itself and well checkmate. Hmm…
It too shall pass.
The entry title is actually a movie I thoroughly enjoyed that then lead me to have a panic attack right after. It’s still a favorite movie of mine. Will I rewatch it probably not.